Being #trans is just like #OpenStreetMap: there's always some government insisting they know the official version.

Please boost: Just to piss off Don Brash and pay him back for using an image of a Māori woman without her #consent on his anti-Māori-wards billboards please share this widely. #nzpol
Via @MichaelaKHulse

SCAM ALERT

An elderly adult may go up to you and pinch your nose without your consent then claim to have stolen your nose

Do not attempt to pay them to reacquire your nose

They do not have your nose

Their supposed proof is just their thumb in between two of their fingers

Do not engage them
You still have possession of your nose

Adults in Britain can no longer type 5318008 into their calculator unless they send a copy of their ID to Casio to verify their age.

faq

q) what is a woman?
a) a woman is somebody who knows they're a woman

q) how can you tell if somebody is a woman?
a) what are you, a fuckin cop?

me spending 4 hours stressing out about all of the things I have to do today before getting started

#shitpost

2 (very) short stories...

#Cats #Caturday

The CEO has arrived to oversee you
#Caturday

This is bound to bring some joy to your day. Everything about it is delightful.

(And the engineering is amazing.)

#Joy #JoyScrolling #Happy #Laughter #Play #Engineering #RollerCoaster

Who would win? A quarter-trillion dollar industry or these four horsemen?

#INFOSEC

"Two sexes," they say. "Any others are unnatural"

MUSHROOMS: but we have 17,000 sexes.

"The female of the species," they proclaim, "is the one that carries the fetus to term. Males can't get pregnant. It's unnatural."

SEAHORSES: but our males do

"If you are born with a vaginal canal, you're a girl," they scream. "If you weren't, you aren't. End of story."

TURTLES: but our males are. and they can even breathe through them.

"Biological sex can't be changed," they shriek, self-righteously."That's just science".

CLOWNFISH: but we do it all the time

"You can pretend to be a gender you weren't born as, they gasp, assuring themselves that surely this time they will emerge victorious, "animals can't just up and change their chromosomes. That's common sense."

BUTTERFLIES AND MOTHS: but we can. explosive chromosomal macroevolution is literally a part of our lifecycle.

"But chromosomes determine biologi-"

BEARDED DRAGONS: ours are determined by the weather

"But the Bible says male and female he made th-"

BLUEHEADED WRASSE: all of us are born female

"But you can't just wake up one day and deci-"

GROUPER (MALE): we literally do.

"But gender isn't flui-"

GROUPER (MALE): sometimes we change back

"But you can't just pick what gender you're going to be on any given day!" They shriek, "It doesn't work that way!!"

GROUPER (FEMALE): ahem

Parallel Bus vs Serial Bus

Pre-mortems? How about developer tarot readings instead

That rewrite you’re planning? Ooh buddy, looks like we drew the Death card, ouch, hmmm that’s not a good sign at all. Bad omen for sure.

The most important quality in a dentist is:

#poll #FediPoll

people be like "omg trains in germany are always so late and unreliable"

bullshit

imagine you have a train departing at 12 and you're worried you'll miss you connection because it's an hour late?

it's okay, there will be a train at 12 as you expected

it's just going to be the one that was supposed to arrive at 11

where do you live?

Ah yes. According to the lab results, I can't read.

ARM SoC? this one believes the term is: "glove".