bash.org #477

"When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, it seems like two minutes.
When you sit on a hot stove for two minutes, it seems like two hours.
That's relativity."
   - Albert Einstein

bash.org #933542

<Brianith> They're the same type of people that think because I know computers, that I'm a hacker. And because I'm a hacker, I can use a computer to tell their refrigerator to sprout legs, walk to me, and tell me their credit card numbers.

Got a joke for you. Man’s struggling in bed. Can’t get it up. Goes to doctor, asks for help.

Doctor stands there, listens and nods. “Got just the thing for you. Go to OnlyFans. Look up FemboyPegliacci.”

Man bursts into tears. “But Doctor,”

i love public wifi hotspots which provide hacker enrichment by implementing “data caps”

“Your daily limit of 350MB has been used” - oh, so terrible, what will I do? Definitely not ifconfig wlan0 down; ifconfig wlan0 hw ether 00:12:FD:AC:AB:FF; ifconfig wlan0 up

oh fuck off. fuck all the way off. https://jsdate.wtf (11/28)

⚠️ If you see a post or DM saying "your account is currently suspended for verification purposes", do NOT click on the link. It is a scam.

Fediverse servers do not ask people to verify their identity. There is an optional self-verification system, but that's just for those who want to use it. No one is ever asked to do it.

If you are in ANY doubt about ANY official-looking message, contact your own server's admin directly using their public email address on your server's website's "About" page.

You get exactly one of the following powers.

Choose wisely.

💡 FEDI. TIPS

Boosting is really important on the Fediverse because it makes whatever you boost federate its gayness to the entire servers of your followers. A boosted post makes your followers' timelines more gay, and also contributes to the gayness of everyone on the servers of your followers.

Instead of venture capital, the Fediverse relies on human beings sharing gayness. This process creates a wonderful rainbow of gayness.

#FediTips

FACT: if you’re not gay on the computer then Alan Turing died for nothing

I'm smol; call that little enbian

Say you have a problem, and you think "I know, I'll solve this by using an AI to generate a regular expression".

Now you have twentington delve emdash democratize.

i am the language model of a modern big tech company
i don't store information, i just generate statistically
i'm trained on stolen data, and i reproduce it shittily
i'll rot your brain and make you look incompetent if you use me

my mom, 4 years into my transition: "you know one of our neighbors' kids went from they/them to she/her. there's just so many nerdy boys who changed into trans women... i'm just saying~ there's something in the water"

oh she's ~so~ close

reversing cause and effect would be huge for her

"nerdy boys" oh you mean male-assumed people who are made fun of for not being masculine enough

"nerdy boys" oh you mean people who spend a lot of time engaging with media like fantasy, scifi, and superheroes: genres defined by a theme of imagining alternate ways of being a person, where we are not bound by the same rules as in our own lives, sometimes even questioning the rules themselves

"nerdy boys" oh you mean being interested in/confined to hobbies where we spend time by ourselves, free of/away from the expectations and perceptions of others

nerdhood was the closest thing to a safe haven a girl could find operating a boy mecha

#trans #transfem

I guess you've heard some bad jokes about Fibonacci sequences?

Well, this one is as bad as the last two you heard put together.

Saw someone that commented that she didn't know she was trans until she saw trans people, and that she would have wanted puberty blockers had she known. That the real problem was lack of representation.

The same was absolutely true for me. I had extremely trans thoughts for years, I just didn't know that's what they meant. I also didn't know puberty blockers were a thing I could have been on until waaaaay later.

I bet my fiancée that this picture of our cats could get 10 billion boosts on Mastodon.

She said she doesn't believe me. She said there's only 13 million accounts on Mastodon. She said there aren't even 10 billion people on Earth. She said it concerns her that I struggle so hard to comprehend large numbers.

Let's prove her wrong everyone. Boost away and show her just how awesome the Mastodon community is.